Warhammer 40000 Soulstorm

The Game: Warhammer 40000 Dawn Of War: Soulstorm is the third expansion for Warhammer 40000 Dawn Of War which is one of the greater rts’ out there. created by Relic and i have to say they did a great job.

Story:7 It’s ok i enjoy the metagame map and it is one of my favorite ways to present a story though the story itself is rather simple. There is war and a lot of it. A absurd 9 way war over a single new system that has exited the warp and you are going to fight all of those wars.

Gameplay: 9.5

The best part about this game is it’s amazing gameplay the base building is solid and the combat is hectic and fun, there are some balancing issues like the fact a long game will always turn into a turtle fest. However all of the 9 races are unique.

The Space Marines: FOR THE EMPORER Heavy armored versatile elite fighters, they adapt to any situation by equipping different weapons to take on the fight at hand.

The Imperial Guard: SEND IN THE NEXT WAVE, the motto of the Imperial Guard who send line after line of expendable infantry overwhelming enemies with sheer bulletstorms and artillery raining down from the sky.

The Sisters Of Battle: PURGE THE UNCLEAN, these nuns with guns enjoy burning demons and heretics with pure faith as their shield and actual FIREpower as their sword.

Tha Orks: WAAAGH! Green iz Da Bestest These space orks with their cockney voices only know war and they charge in with monstrous amounts of boyz to chop the enemy into pieces scrap whatever armor or tanks they find and ORKIFY it so that ‘dey can use it.

The Eldar: We Ride The Tempest We Bring The Storm. An elite race of space elves that make up for their small numbers with elite ranged weapons and plenty of teleporting nonsense.

The Dark Eldar: I Do Not Fear Death, Death Fears ME. Remember the Eldar well these are Eldar corrupted by the warp, in gameplay these guys do 3 things Vehicles they do them alot, Collecting dead souls to use as a tertiary resource, and morale damage, they have guns that do morale damage, swords that do morale damage, items that do morale damage, spells that do morale damage, vehicles that do morale damage, buildings that do morale damage, and grenades that do morale damage. It’s what they do.

The Chaos Space Marines. BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD DEATH TO THE EMPEROR, Space Marines touched by the warp and corrupted they now make pacts with chaos gods for power but they must give them something for example a pact with khorne means you must kill things often but you will get powerful demons to fight with you. they use elite melee focused units as well as elite vehicles.

The Necron: We Have Returned. An Ancient race of machines that have awakened to take over the galaxy, with elite units that move slowly but have high health and damage as well as the ability to come back to life make them very effective turtlers.

The Tau: I can’t even quote these guys because they are too awesome i mean they are Space Communist Mecha Weeaboos alright Space Communist Mecha Weeaboos, in gameplay they don’t know what melee is unless they make kroot but really they have lazer guns that are good lazer guns they have railguns and artillery suits and jetpacks and asndfjksadfhgjs,d they are the best.

The Look: 8

It looks pretty good but it could be a bit better or more stylized.

The Universe: 8

There is so much universe for warhammer 40000 it’s not even funny however only a little bit of it is given in quotes, and background text on maps.

Soundtrack: 8.3

It’s epic and it fits the battle scenes perfectly however it’s difficult to listen outside of game, and it doesnt fit some parts of base construction.

Overall: 9

If you are looking for fun with friends and you guys like tactical short rts this is definitely the game to play smallish unit caps not for everyone but it makes what units you do have more elite.

Ultra Rapid Fire

I know I said that this week would be 40k Dark Crusade but URF has been everything i've been playing since April 1st and all of my friends have been playing it too so it gets the spot and Dark Crusade gets next week. Also this is not a standard review because URF is a single gamemode in a larger game so it will just be gameplay League review comes during May the Month of Moba. So let's get into this.

Gameplay is everything in this but there is a short story to go along with this. On the day N.U.R.F was supposed to come out and ruin everything for everyone a celebratory monster energy drink was spilled on the upload server, FOREVER CHANGING EVERYTHING and thus ULTRA RAPID FIRE was born.

Everything is League of Legends on steroids everything moves faster, everything attacks faster, everything cools down faster, nothing costs mana, It's insane it's crazy,it's broken unbalanced and horrible..... and I love it so much. It is beyond fun you join for a quick game and suddenly it's 3 am and AP Twisted Fate still has not lost. I mean look here is my match history. It doesnt lose it's insane. Karthus rains 24/7 artillery on the field hitting everyone, Azir advances with a full army rather then a squad, Hecarim is banned everytime, Fizz can't be hit, Alistar doesn't stop stunning, and Twisted Fate is op. I would have reviewed Dark Crusade but this took over so much of my time I quickly found myself writing this at 8:00 pm the night before this is supposed to be uploaded and as soon as I finish this I am going to play some more so in short. PLAY URF just go here download the game and play it do it do it do it you know you want to it's free and it's only available for a limited time.

The Last Federation (Or is It)

The Game:

A turn based bullethell game made by Arcen games that wants to blend innovative combat with active and procedural storytelling giving the player the opportunity to make their own story.

Story: 9 (I do love anything that lets me build my own story though)

A Hydral Ladies and Mentlegen

You are a Hydral a space hydra, and you are the last Hydral because every other Hydral, was killed because they were a bunch of spacefaring fascist overlords. But not you or at least hopefully not you thats for you to decide, but after your race’s almost genocide you are imprisoned on the planet of your only rival (Insert race here) but you break out steal their prototype battlecruiser and flee the planet on your way to create peace in the galaxy through any means necessary. There are 8 races each with their own ideals and abilities as well as goals it is your job to manipulate all of these things and create and unstoppable faction, maybe get all the warmongers to work together and burn the rest of the galaxy to the ground, get the super capitalist robots to deny all trade and dump copious amounts of toxic waste on anyone who is not willing to join you, or create a new form of peace getting all of the peace loving races to work together and unite to push the warmongers either out of the galaxy or out of existence. The races are interesting to discover so I won’t tell you to much more their.

Gameplay: 7

It’s interesting but not for everyone, turn based bullethell works in a fun way you select where you are going to move towards taking into account momentum and turning radius of course, then you aim where you are going to shoot your bullets. Early game your bullets will hit almost everytime however it is a top priority to dodge enemy bullets. You also have the ability to divert power to Engines, Weapons, or Shields, your ship has so much power and you set the three of these to whatever the situation demands, an enemy too big to fight shows up power down weapons power up shields and thrusters and book it. Already set yourself on a solid movement path take a turn to power down the engines and fire some extra powerful shots at the enemy. There are also special moves and additional ancient Hydral tech you pick up on the way to make life easier for you and to make death easier for those who oppose you.

The Look: 7

It has a style and a decent one at that, all of the aliens are unique from bug people, to robots, TO AWESOME INTELLIGENT BOAR THAT SOMEHOW FLY A SPACESHIP. (cough) excuse me I got carried away in the coolness that is a race of intelligent boar.

The Universe: 8

You know a game has a solid universe when you have the option to sit out and just watch what happens, lore wise not much happens however all of the races act like real intelligent beings for example, they may give up some small morals for allies at first but over time the two races blend and their moral compasses (compi?) begin to point in the same direction and they get along better. Most of the sane races look down upon you dumping toxic waste on a planet full of enemies the honorable ones calling it cheating the less honorable ones calling it a waste of good land. It is deep and it is a living breathing universe however most of the backstory is thrown out the window in seconds and not really brought up again.

Soundtrack: 7
It’s solid it fits the theme but has a tendency to loop fairly often and is rather noticeable when it does it it’s still nice and during combat it’s great but listening to it outside of the games context is rather underwhelming.

Example of Soundtrack

Overall: 7.5

It’s innovative but it is a niche it is not for everyone but if you are like me (or Foamy) and have this morbid curiosity to know just what a turn based bullet hell is like pick the game up it’s good fun and there are even difficulties like You are OP for those less masterful with bullethells.

Next month's Theme Fun for the whole friend group. These will be games me and my friends find ourselves playing (and not being very good at) rather often starting with the game of our current free time. Warhammer 40,000 Dark Crusade (Which is the best because mecha communist space weeaboos for lyfe)




-
Yamuu

Dungeons Of Dredmor

The Game: A very well done Roguelike by the men over at Gaslamp Games Inc. a very tounge and cheek style game nothing being taken seriously at all. (With the exception of astrology which is taken so seriously it is no longer serious.)
Story:5

The evil lord Dredmor has reawakened and will soon take over the ENTIRE WORLD muawhahaha. A hero needs to save the land and unfortunatly that hero is you. You are thrown into the dungeon and the door is locked behind you you can’t leave until you kill Dredmor or die trying.

Gameplay: 9

It’s brutal it will kill you, permadeath is the only true way to play. You start the game and choose up to 7 skills from a nice long list in front of you anything from swords, maces, and shields, to flesh magic NecroEconomics the economy of the undead, and with the dlc Communism where you use the powers of the motherland to form glorious union with your enemies and weapon. The game is procedurally generated and it creates some massive floors for you to slowly make your way through. And I mean slowly trying to rush through will result in a quick and painful death at the hands of enemies like Supa-Deth, or a carrot monster. You have health and mana to regain health you need to devour some mad food like an omelette made out of 4 eggs put into a compressor don’t think too hard on that one. Oh what’s that you ran out of mana serving queen and country as a over powered Steamknight warlock, well then get ready because “Your mana is low drink more booze” so get quaffing.

The Look: 7

It’s stylized and very cartoony but it looks look animation quality is minimal but it’s enough considering the OG roguelike looked like this.

Yeah we’ll take what we can get

The Universe: 6

It’s crazy it’s consistant but there is so little of it. We have the lutefisk god inconsequentia some form of dark lord or three strolling about and the grand Archmages looking for more booze.
Soundtrack: 5

It’s alright but I tend to mute it and listen to something else.
Overall: 8

A nice fun solid roguelike that you can lose days too just trying to move one more floor. I have

thrown hours of my life at this game trying to beat it on Going Rouge permadeath and I have failed. Highly recommend this game andl all of its dlc to anyone even semi interested in the Roguelike or Roguelite genre.



Next Week:



-
Yamuu

Sorry Guys No Review This Week

Just a quick update to apoligize for there will be no update this week I have had so much to do this week and will return to my regular updates next week

Post Apocalyptic Mayhem

First of all before we begin this blog I would like to formally introduce Foamy a good friend of mine who will be writing the reviews for the inferior console games but for now he is playing Touhou because he doesn't trust me with his baby which is fair as even I wouldn't trust me with his baby. His baby is a little crazy though. However onto the revie...Wait a second also starting right now each month my reviews will have a theme this month's theme is games that deserve more players. So we kick it off with a game that deserved more players but just couldn't get them.                                                                                                 Post Apocalyptic Mayhem.

Source

    

The Game:

Post Apocalyptic Mayhem is an action racing game created by Steel Monkeys. Oh you've never heard of them well that's kind of the point of this month is to get some unknown names out there.Story: 1

There basically is none the apocalypse wiped out most everything now everyone threw some cars together and thats it. (scrunchyface) really. they could have done at least something with it even gave it at least half an ass this is definitely the games weakest point.

Gameplay: 8

Possibly the games strongest point the game plays solidly controls smoothish but all in all it works plus i mean look at that arsenal lets give it a rundown shall we.(source for all pictures google images)

 

Logger outfitted with that menacing spike roller that turns cars into paste. Drops logs off of the back of it to flatten hoods and decimate tires. And not to mention flip out twin sawblades to chop a car in two if it gets flanked this vehicle can cause some damage but takes time getting up to speed.

Childhood dreams equipped with the scoop of destiny that straight up chucks other vehicles into the air. With the ability to drop extra oil behind him and cause everything to get all spinny before rolling down the windows for a Molotov cocktail barrage. In short Childhood Dreams is where it's at.

Skorch with twin linked flamethrowers capable of turning a car to red paste on the hood. Magnetic mines on the sides to stick to and blow the enemy away, and to finish it all off it throws toxic explosives out the back with a hefty supply of dynamite very fast and handles well but damage is limited if you are falling behind.

Space Cowboy amped up with a portable electromagnetic field that he sticks to enemies to pull in every piece of scrap metal at high speeds. EMP mines that shutdown cars completely for a few seconds and an exhaust pipe that shoots fire. very fast but very low kill potential when in first.

Nitrogenius equipped with freezethrowers to turn a car to ice. Extra cans of liquid nitrogen to slick the roads and spike the road with solid ice to stop your opponents dead in their tracks. Low damage until he is in first place and he's fairly squishy so he can't get there easily.

The Alchemist shooting toxic waste at you from the front and dropping fake power-ups out the back. Oh and it throws a metric tonne of pink lawn flamingos covered in explosives to destroy everything that ever existed.

Kitty is a very small very fast very overpowered vehicle that unicorn horn is a drill that turns your bumper into scrap it launches monkey bombs out the back and clouds of super death gas out the sides that instant kill anyone that gets caught in the damn thing. OP

Nucloid a small compact fast electric car powered by a miniature nuclear reactor. Dropping smart bombs out the back and throwing enemies forward with its front weapon a small concentrated fission blast. and it has nukes mini nukes mind you but still nukes highest kill potential but squishy and difficult to turn.

The Veteran a military vehicle with double pneumatic drills a couple of heavy machine gun emplacements and a handful of tank traps this bad boy is ready to rock and roll and level whatever gets in its way.

Ice Scream a ridiculous ice cream truck with small explosive snow cones fired from the front mounted penguin. Icy gas expelled from the sides and Indiana Jones style ice cream boulders. This thing is one bad happiness machine.

Tow'er a simple tow truck with hydraulic claws that chomp down on the enemy quickly reducing their vehicle to little more than a pile of upholstery. He tosses boots off of the sides to turn a car into a 3 wheeled vehicle which as you can guess ruins handling. plus it can THROW a car backwards flattening everything.

And finally The Fuzz equipped with dual grenade launchers it can raze anything in front of it while dropping barricades behind it but for his fellow driver he offers some delicious explosive donuts out of the side cannons.

The Look: 6

It looks alright graphics are good and it keeps a solid theme of scrap metal but there is not much color in the world it's all very bland greys and browns.

The Universe: 1

See story

Soundtrack: 7

It tries to be very rockish but it's pretty good Cold War Beach is the best though so you know.

Overall: 7.5

It's a solid game lots of fun but the single player is iffy so make sure some of your friends get it to because it really is a fun game. Achievement hunters beware though 100% this game is nearly impossible without cheesing it.

That is all

-Yamuu



Next Week: Dungeons Of Dredmor